(Life Wire) -- After his 10-year marriage ended in 2004, New Yorker Phil Lee, 42, found himself tagged with the modern-day scarlet letter: "D" -- divorced.He wondered how that (not to mention his three children, ages 19, 11 and 9) would affect his future dating life.So, make sure you really are ready to look to the future. Show that you've learned lessons from your previous marriage and moved on.Assure your new partner that she or he is a priority and provides what you want and need now.Before making introductions, tell your kids about the person you're dating, and why they'll like him or her.If your divorce was finalized within the past six months, wait longer and go slower with introductions, as the children are still grieving, Hartman says.• Know what you want out of the relationship and what you're capable of."Be honest with yourself first, then with potential partners," Hartman says. You've revealed your relationship status to your date, and he's not choking on his shrimp scampi.
I’ve been divorced for five years and I only recently started dating again.The fitness-business owner says it hasn't been much of a hindrance. "At my age, a lot of the women I meet have children themselves, so it's generally a back-and-forth over each other's children," says Lee.He jokes, "Women that don't have children and don't want to have children don't really talk to me." Although the divorce rate is the lowest it's been since 1970 (3.6 per 1,000 people), about 40 to 45 percent of all marriages will end in divorce, according to an Associated Press estimate.Broaching the subject When is it time to delve into the facts of your past? She advises: • If you are going through a divorce, tell the person you are dating pronto.Don't beat around the bush, and don't say you are already divorced if you are still in the process of it, as did one man Hartman dated.
In general, anger is an uncommon reaction, unless you haven't been forthright to begin with.