I don’t think I had the language or the structure to articulate what about it I didn’t like.So, that feeling, ended up being identified by my youth pastor and others as “sin.” I was told I had a sinful attitude when it came to the book and being pure.I also read some of In the spring of 2013, I started a hashtag #noshamemov (short for No Shame Movement) so that people would have a platform for sharing their stories of growing up in purity culture. In the 3 years I’ve been doing this, lots of folks who shared their stories point to IKDG as either central or playing a significant role in how purity culture was enforced.It came up so often I finally decided to check it out from the library.Premarital sex and pregnancy were major social disgraces and a lot of guidance from parents and older family friends (we call them all aunts and uncles) was built around avoiding those disgraces.
It seemed safer: who wouldn’t trust their parents to have a say in their husband?I once called it that, but no more.: I first read IKDG while in college in Jamaica.I’d moved there from the UK where I’d attended an all-immigrant congregation that packaged purity culture as counter-cultural self-empowerment and self-love.And that’s so much bigger than sex; there’s a critical portion of a healthy life that I have to strain to reach that was damaged in the name of God.I actually didn’t read the book until a couple years ago.
The US church was afraid of sex and sin, and so we became afraid too. Even in the black churches that I attended, this book was widely read.